'D' is for...

It’s 10:30am and I’m eating a Magnum Classic Ice- Cream. It’s kind of tricky to type and eat an ice- cream I might add. I felt I needed/ deserved something after yet another hairy morning. I think I will stay indoors and hide away until my luck improves.

It all started this day two weeks ago when I drove over my brand spanking new phone. Again, who the hell does that? (still not over it). I was so annoyed, I decided to have an ‘almost’ complete digital amnesty of my own, and all was quiet in my digital world. I did without a phone for a whole week, and only agreed to start using a really really broken one, due to everyone else’s frustration and not being able to reach me.

It already feels like an eternity until our next upgrade. Meanwhile, my substitute phone doesn’t hold a charge for more than an hour, and wait for it… it won’t charge in the house, or on any other USB cable, other than in the car!! THIS, is extremely irritating, and so I am still rarely contactable via phone.

But it’s been 2 weeks, and I’ve adapted somewhat with a lot of extra e-mail, Facebook Messenger and driving around, I’ve been pretty much managing to get by. Of course with all this extra thinking and planning, my already distracted self appears to be prone to doing the most ridiculous things of late.

We decided to go to the playground yesterday evening, because the sun was shining, and when the sun shines we are all about the ‘Carpe Diem’ in Ireland. Playground, ice-cream, you know the drill.
Only problem was, my wallet was nowhere to be found. Kids were growing more impatient in the car waiting for me as I scampered around the house in disbelief that wallet was in none of it’s usual places. OH NO…

Oh no no no no no. So… the last place I saw it, was in the forecourt of the petrol station. I had carefully negotiated a box of Fish Fingers, Waffles and Milk onto the front seat of the car, and for some unknown reason, during this negotiation process I placed my wallet on the roof of the car, remarking at the time that was a ridiculous idea, because I’d forget it’s there. And there you have it, wallet was last seen on the roof of my car!

Rang the shop and there was no sign of wallet. Rang my mum who lives close to the petrol station, and she said she would go have a look along the road. I get a call 5 minutes later to say wallet was in the ditch, and my money, cards and everything else a girl keeps in her wallet, was strewn all over the road and in the ditch. Wallet had obviously been driven over a few time, completely burst and the coins and cards survived a few assaults with the tyres too. Apart from a single library card, everything was accounted for. But again, who does that?????? ARGH! I’m a semi intelligent, quite educated woman for goodness sake!

Dusted myself off, got up to the usual school run tizzy this morning. All aboard and off we go… nope, going nowhere, where are the keys of the car? After muchos searching, keys were nowhere to be found and school was almost starting. Hubby’s old car was sitting outside, don’t worry insured and all, so a quick transfer later and off we went. Our eldest chap, rolling his head in disbelief, “mammy, first your phone, then your wallet…”. It’s like having a second husband sometimes, what can I say.

I get back home and tidy a little in the hope key will turn up. Nothing. I decide to check the car because sometimes they get left there, but for some mystery beyond me, which has never happened before, the car had somehow locked itself after we left it this morning. I suspect there is someone conspiring against my sanity at this point, and e-mail my hubby to explain all that’s happened. I’d have texted of course, but my phone was dead, and as we know it only charges in the car, and the car was, well… locked, and the keys MISSING. Seriously at this point I really, truly and honestly for the first time ever used the expression ‘FML’!!!!!

I saw the ice-cream, on my search. I took it out of the freezer and sat it on the counter. At this point it was far more appetising than a cup of tea and a few biscuits. Couldn’t believe the ice-cream was still there actually. It survived the whole night, unspotted and now it was mine. We got the ice-creams (sponsored by a friend since I was sans wallet), coming from the playground yesterday evening. The playground was so much fun but we all nearly suffocated with the smell of slurry that was being spread in a nearby field. It was so bad that when we got home our clothes had the smell trapped in them, so I bundled EVERYTHING into the washing machine when we got in the door.

Wait a minute…